“The blessing of the Lord makes one rich, and He adds no sorrow with it” Proverbs 10:22, NKJV.
Here is understanding that can help you in life if you receive it:
Some people aren’t ready to change.
Some people don’t want your help.
If you can understand these two things, you will save yourself plenty of time and pain. Maybe you’re like me, you are wired to fix things, you’re wired to help things grow and make things better. But what do you do when they don’t want it?
I’ve learned over the years that you can bring a horse to water, but you cannot force it to drink. So many women are deeply depressed today because they gave all they had to someone that could care less. They bought cars, houses, clothes and shoes for someone that didn’t want their help. Now, their credit is all messed up and the man is gone out the door, the person is gone back on the streets, the relative ended up right back in jail, and the friend you tried to help went right back to the abusive boyfriend.
Listen, my sister, thank God you are wired the way you are, but you have to know when to back off and let God do the fixing. Let Him do the changing and let Him make the spiritual adjustments that you can’t see. Bless them, encourage them and yes, fervently pray for them, but you go on and live the life God has called you to live.
In the words of a DOTK reader, Alisa Blair, “When people don’t want our help, we must practice healthy boundaries. Not out of anger but tough love. Sometimes a person must feel their pain in order to address it. When we push to make them well, we mute their pain. They must feel it for themselves. BUT, we must be careful we aren’t making “helping” our identity. If we do that, then stopping leaves us feeling empty. When we feel empty, we try to “fix” so the cycle continues. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for someone is to back away and let them choose whether they want to heal.”
Now let’s pray: Thank you, Lord. You know how to get my attention. Whenever I find myself trying to help people that do not want it, it’s frustrating, tiring and expensive. I give every person to you. Only you can give them what they truly need. Help them to see your light and understand your love. Now, I pray you strengthen me. Replenish me. Restore all that I’ve given away or purchased out of good intentions, and help me to move forward and live the life you’ve called me to live. In Jesus’ name, Amen.