Don’t settle. Wait for real love.

“I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me.” Song of Solomon 7:10, NIV.

When it came time to choose who I would marry, I remember pleading with God to speak to me. I wanted Him to loudly speak with lightening in His voice, “Kesha, marry this one!!!” In my mind I had three options: The guy I had known since middle school who my mother absolutely adored, the guy from my youth ministry who was on fire for God, and the one I had met in college. He was a campus ministry president, handsome in every way and loved the Lord. Right from the start, I knew there was something different about him. So I sat back and observed how he treated others, how he treated his mother, how he treated me, and how he behaved in different situations. After years of building a solid friendship, I knew he was a good one, but was he for me? Bowed down on my bedroom floor, I said, “Lord, I don’t want to marry the wrong guy and be miserable. Show me Lord if he is for me!” God didn’t say a word. Instead He opened my eyes to see the obvious: this guy loved me and I loved him. He never pressured me to have sex before marriage, never cursed at me, never raised his voice or his hand at me, never cheated on me, and never made me feel like anything less than special. I wouldn’t have settled for anything less because I know who I am and what I deserve. But to see someone do this for me out of a love for God blessed me to no end.

I married him because God helped me recognize real love.

If you are single ask yourself this, do you know real love when you see it? Real love is the bond that holds a relationship together through anything. That kind of love only comes from the Lord my sister. It can only be seen when you wait and observe. You are special. Know your worth. Don’t settle. Wait for real love.

Prayer: Father God, I thank you for your wisdom. I want real love. Help me understand what it is. Help me not be blinded by sexual desires or by what someone can do for me. Help me wait until you bless me with the one you have waiting for me. Open my eyes to see real love when he comes my way. Show me who I am and my worth. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

(Read James 1:17; Hebrews 10:36)

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34 thoughts on “Don’t settle. Wait for real love.”

  1. The man you described as your husband sounds like a character in a book of “Perfect people,” but I pray to God I get blessed as you have been blessed and come here to share my testimony. Love you.
    Keep writing your heart out. God bless us.

    1. Thanks for that advise I really need to read this I’m a single mother and was engaged but it never happen for me and ever since I was searching I settle for more than less but now I’m single again and I’m going to take your advise I’m going to wait on the lord for real love that man that he has for me. Thank you for making me know and understand my self worth. God bless you

  2. To start reading this devotional & “I belong to you” suddenly starts to play on Pandora I know this isn’t a mistake . Especially since my name is Keshia as well.This word is right on time as am believing & prepping for God best in my life. Thank You so much!

    1. Keisha, I believe that God finds ways to talk to us. His love language to us is so beautiful. No man on earth could be so loving to us like we desire. A godly man is the closest we can get. That’s a good thing!!! May your future be blessed. I am married and have 3 girls. I pray the Lord makes it clear to them the one they should give there hearts to. I prayed that pray at 14 years old. I wasn’t a Christian at the time nor was he ,but God answered my prayer and made it loud and clear to me. I heard His voice.Now we both serve the Lord and have been married for 15 years. Wait on God to say Go. He will give you the desire of your heart.

  3. Thank you God for sending this devotion my way to be open to see what you are showing me give me the wisdom I need and Jesus name Amen


  5. Thank you very much. This speaks to my heart this morning. It is very hard to be in the world & not be part of it. Your words through the spirit certainly give me hope. I will continue toward keeping my eyes on Jesus in this season of life. Thank you sister, keep writing!! (Hugs)

  6. OMG! ! This message is so unbelievably right on time. Thank you so much DOTK ministries for always displaying such inspirational and up lifting messages. 👍💖

  7. Yes, lord help me to wait and see who you want for me, who truly loves me for all the right reasons. Who will love me and my twovkids,injn Amen

  8. Good Morning
    Sister’s in Christ
    I do know one thing I thx God for my Mother hallelujah she was a upright Woman of God she instilled Jesus in me while carry me in her womb then told me that my calling when I was about twenty, but at know surprise the Lord Jesus comes back in constantly keeps reminding me of who I am in Christ Jesus and my calling even in the Mist of uncertainty situations circumstances misunderstandings projections betrayal in my life he still lets me know I have my hands on you Bonnie you are my daughter You Belong To Me Hallelujah but yet still tells me I must I’ve got to be marriage to the right one this time for his calls for his glory I’ve listen to his voice, but yet I don’t see nor understand something said
    1. You were broken
    2. Your taken
    3.your spoken for
    Please Lord Jesus help me to see your purpose for my eyes can’t encounter what plans you yet have for my life
    I see a chance please enlarge my territory increase and increase hallelujah I’m not the same glory be too God thanks for the blood of Jesus the humble lamb that was sacrifice Shed his blood for me I feel so happy and free with Jesus purchase sacrifice the blood! !!!
    Be blessed Sisters be blessed. .

    3 Proven Ways to Run the Race That is Set

    Several times in the Bible, our everyday life in Christ is described as a race. We’re off and running in this marathon, and each sunrise presents new challenges as we hurry along. All the while, we know that God has provided the path we’re supposed to take.

    But how exactly can we run this race that is set before us? Thankfully, we’re not left jogging in the dark. The author of Hebrews provides 3 proven ways to keep us on the right track.

    We get our start in the race of life by remembering that we’re not alone:

    “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses…” (Hebrews 12:1a)

    When ancient sprinters dashed off in their quest for victory and the laurel crown, they often did so in a large arena filled with spectators (much like sporting events today). Peering up into the stands full of billowing clothes and moving people looked somewhat like looking up into the clouds.

    And that’s what it’s like for us in our race, too. We’re not the only ones to take this journey. People have run this way before, as Hebrews 11 shows (a chapter that’s often called the “hall of faith”). Our spiritual ancestors, such as Abraham and Noah, answered God’s call and set out on the race set before them. Their example gives us encouragement.

    But we don’t have to look back to find “heroes of the faith.” We can find them today—right in the pews and chairs on any given Sunday morning. Christians are meant to make this journey together, and we’re much stronger when we do. Seeing the powerful examples of faithfulness around you can give you the courage you need to charge ahead.

    “For this reason I am sending to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord. He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.” (1 Corinthians 4:17)

    Sometimes, however, other problems can keep us from running our race, even when the crowd is cheering us on.

    If we’re to keep chugging along on the right path, we can’t do so if we’re constantly tripping up. The writer of Hebrews describes it this way:

    “… let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.” (Hebrews 12:1b)

  9. Way before marriage, I’m waiting on God to bring that man into my life. Where will I meet him? When? I pray it’s God’s will that I do meet and marry, but if that’s not His will, I’m good with that too. Better alone than with the wrong one. Thank you, Lord, for your love, grace, and mercy.

    1. Today’s Truth
      If it’s for you it will come when you least expect it not looking hallelujah! !!
      “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” (Ephesians 6:12 NIV).

      Friend to Friend

      Of all the roles and responsibilities that God has given us as women, the position of a prayer warrior or intercessor is perhaps the greatest of all. An intercessor is a person who intervenes or prays for another person. It was derived from the Greek word enteuxis, which means to go before a king with a petition or plea on behalf of someone else. In essence, it means the same thing today. We go before the King of kings with a petition or plea on someone’s behalf. What we accomplish on our knees in the invisible realm will ultimately affect what we see in the visible realm.

      As a wife, there is no other person who is more called or more qualified to pray for your man than you. As a mother, there is no other person more qualified to pray for your children than you.

      In the Bible, God describes the marriage of a man and a woman as a visual example of the spiritual union between Jesus Christ and the Church (all Christians). Believers are called “the bride of Christ” (Revelation 19:7). A marriage is a walking, talking, earthly example of the heavenly relationship between God’s Son and those who believe on His name. God instructs men, “Love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25).

      There is someone who wants to destroy that living example, and his name is Satan. Jesus said, “The thief [Satan] comes only to steal, and kill, and destroy” (John 10:10). He desires to destroy the God-ordained and designed institution of marriage. He began with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and continues his destructive tactics even today. Satan is not very creative, but he’s very effective, and he uses the same temptations and tactics today that he used in the first marriage on earth. Satan has proclaimed an all-out assault on the family and he begins at the top—with the husband and wife.

      If you are married, I encourage you to pray for your marriage. If you are single, I encourage you to pray for the marriages of your friends and family.

      So many times we fail to see the real enemy. The writer of Ephesians explains, “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” (Ephesians 6:12).

      When having a conflict with my husband.. ( male friend relationship) that the Lord has blessed me to be in the one he has blessed to invest in me to encourage me Bonnie things is going to work out your victorious ,prosperous, healed, happy, whole, blessed and talk to your mountain how big your God is yes I had a true male friend to tell me this one to remind me, but God , God can even when I do believe he gets upset with me ( I know that he never stops praying for me ) need to stop, take a deep breath, and think…who is the real enemy here? There is a spiritual battle raging all around us that we can’t even see, but is very real. It is the greater reality. It is a battle that is not to be feared, but one that is to be recognized and fought in the only place where it can be won—in prayer.

      Below are Scriptures that I use to pray for my husband My husband to be. . and my son. I encourage you to pray them over the men in your life.

      Let’s Pray:

      Dear Lord, I pray for __________ from head to toe.

      His Mind ­­- That he will have the mind of Christ and think as the Holy Spirit would lead him and not the flesh. (1 Corinthians 2:16)
      His Eyes -That You will keep his eyes from temptation and that he will turn his eyes from sin. (Matthew 6:13; Mark 9:47)
      His Ears – That he will hear Your still small voice instructing him. (1 Kings 19:12, Psalm 32:8)
      His Mouth -That his words will be pleasing to You. (Psalm 19:14)
      His Neck – That the decisions that turn his head will honor You in all regards.
      (Psalm 25:12)
      His Shoulders – That he will not carry burdens and worries on his own shoulders, but trust that nothing is too hard for You. (Genesis 18:14; Jeremiah 32:17)
      His Heart -That he will love and trust You with his whole heart. (Deuteronomy 6:5, Proverbs 3:5)
      His Back – That You will protect him from harm in the spiritual and physical realms. (Deuteronomy 23:14 NLT)
      His Arms – That You will be his strength. (Psalm 73:26)
      His Hands – That he will enjoy the work of his hands and see it as a gift from You. (Ecclesiastes 3:13, 5:19)
      His Ring Finger (for my husband) – That he will love me as Christ loved the Church. (Ephesians 5:25-27)
      His Side – That he will have godly friends who hold him up and spur him on. (Proverbs 27:17; Proverbs 12:26)
      His Sexuality (for my husband to be ) are husband – That he will not be tempted by sexual sin, but satisfied and fulfilled in our marriage bed. (Matthew 6:13; Proverbs 5:18-19)
      For my Son—That he will not be tempted by sexual sin. (Matthew 6:13)

      His Legs – That he will stand firm on the truth, knowing that if he does not stand firm in his faith, he will not stand at all. (Psalm 62:6; Isaiah 7:9)
      His Knees – That he will humble himself before You and be strong, courageous, and careful to do everything written in Your Word so that he will be prosperous and successful. (James 4:10; Joshua 1:8-9)
      His feet – That You will order his steps, and that he will walk in Your truth. (Proverbs 4:25; Psalm 26:3)
      Now It’s Your Turn

      Consider asking your husband, son, nephew, or male friend for some specific ways that you can pray for him today.

      Look up each of the Scripture references above and make the prayers specific to the needs of the person you are praying for.

      Find one friend with whom you can pray for your marriage. Are marriage commit to be pray for each other’s marriage on a regular basis.

  10. I strongly agree with this devotional. God bless you. God is able to make all grace abound to us. He is the God of mercy n new beginnings. No matter your situation in life, He can bring another man in your life who will love you more than the man you first invested ur life in. Sisters be encouraged God can do it again!! Let’s remain faithful to Him.

  11. Amen this message is for me and i received this in Jesus Name thank You Lord. Yes i will wait for real love the one the Lord have for me. Thank you WOG for this post GOD continue to bless you with all wisdom from of above .💕💕💕🌹🌹😃❤🙌💃🏃

  12. My Sister in Christ, I went to 5:00am Prayer Warriors Ministry this morning and i spoke about this very subject that had me in captive for many years. Looking for that perfect man. It wasn’t until I accepted Jesus Christ as the Lord of my life and God spoke to me and said the love that I am looking for is in Him and not man and He said the faithfulness that you have give it to Me. He said He is everything I am looking for and hoping for. I have been committed to Jesus for that last six years and I have a ring on my ring finger that reads True Love Waits. I am waiting on God if it is His will for my life. God is awesome. Peace and Blessings always

    1. Amen April Williams do believe if it’s for you I don’t care how far the individual push you back because they’re afraid of true love when Jesus has ordained it are afraid what they may do too you because of their pass bad experience when God is in the plan I don’t care what the devil do it can’t win only Jesus knows ones destiny I don’t mind waiting on what the Lord want for my life,
      Remember somebody else always want what they’re telling the other person what not to do most likely they’re having problems in don’t want to see the one who is asking for advice to be happy, but thx God for Jesus he knows the decision plan for your life even if he has to remove or get other people attention in believe me will in a way that they will be crying out save me for the betrayal I’ve put on one’s life, but still Jesus can use the same ppl to bless you they must do right saith the Lord

  13. Thank you God, I waited for the one you chose for me. I waited two years, in those two years it was just me and the LORD!!!. Building a closer relationship. Thank you God In Jesus Name Amen. Single Ladies wait on the LORD, he will send you someone who will truly LOVE you because it happened to me. Wait on GOD!!!!!

  14. Lord, I’m waiting for the one for over 10 years now and beginning to loose faith. When will I meet the godly man? Do I need to do the searching or will you send him my my way?

    1. Let go in let God do the overflow in your life Jesus will do his own business however he wants to fir his glory

  15. I thank u for this passage. N I prayed tat prayer. I’m with the father of our little girl n I prayed if he the one for me or not. If my God show me my Real True Love n show me real true love I’m graceful n I’m waiting😤😤. I know my God is Awesome. Thank u Jesus👍😁.Amen Amen

  16. So very Beautiful DOTK ❗🌷🌹🌸 THANK YOU🙌🙏 SWEET JESUS👑👑 for REAL LOVE ❗💯💏💑💪💘💪💈💒💐💍💌👏👐🙏🙏🙏🎩👑🎁📖🎀🎉

  17. This devotional is so awesome.I was married to a Wonderful ,God fearing man for 36 yrs.I prayed more for him than I did for.myself.I would always pray and ask God to let us always love, and trust each other and let only death separate us. It was no other man or woman, it was death. On Feb 14,2008 my wonderful handsome husband went to be with the Lord. Ladies let your husband find you.Trust God to send you the right husband.I loved my husband and I miss him so much .I still cry because I miss our relationship. I would have married him all over again.So my sister’s wait on God and trust him to bring the right man into your life and I know he will because he did it for me. Love to all my Sister’s in Christ Jesus.

  18. what is the hope for me to ever find real love and peace after having made a mistake in choosing even though I have been a child of God since I was 15. I married at 35. He pretended to be a child of God became active in Church. after we married I discovered that he had lied about every thing like his age his education and his job experiences and many other things. for example he was 27 when we married but he lied that he was 36. he treated like a stupid little girl. always like to make all the decisions. he had no job am the only one that works yet he like to control the money. he always claim am not submissive, talks ill of me to people in the church and on our street, flirts with other women on the phone, ignores me and keep malice with me most of the time. even when am sick or he still ignore me. he doesn’t help me with the children or anything. so many things he did to let me know he does not care about me . in fact he always like to inflict emotional pain on me most of the time. Now he has left the house for almost a year now. I want to move on with my life. I was relieve when he left, I feel like God wants to free me from the bondage. but now the people from the church are making me feel like I need to patch things with him, they are mounting pressure on me. they calling me and him together in order to settle. he is still his old self, still talking trash about me to people even to my own family. I feel like I may have to live the church. please daughters of the King I need your response. we live in Nigeria. Here divorced women are not respected especially in the church. I also need your prayers. they also make me feel like God cannot allow me to get out of the marriage even though it is not good for me .that once I have entered I have no option than to stay no matter what happens.

  19. Dear sis in Nigeria, just know that u worship God of your heart. He is the one who knew you from the start. Lay your life before Him.let him take over and stop struggling alone. Pray persistently. Pray knowing that God listens to you. And have Faith. God bless you dear!!!

  20. It amazing what prayer can do, when we understand how to make our request be known to God. Thank you Sis Bonnie Blair for taking time out to shared these Bible verses with us and showing us the different ways in which we can pray and apply God’s word in praying for our husband to be, sons, nephews and scriptures which we can apply to our own prayer lives as women of God. I’ll surely apply them to my life. Thanks you God for allowing her to shared with us; Thanks to DOTK sisters in Christ speaking to our hearts daily.

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